Help! My Child Has Been Kicked Out of School!
The British have increased their media and news coverage regarding misbehaving children in school in recent days. The topic usually ends with a solution that centers around removing troublemakers from the traditional classroom setting.
However, the discussion involved a new, unique solution. The new solution is that idea that parents should stay home and monitor their children once the kids have been removed from school for their bad behavior.
This doesn't make any sense and is a nuisance to parents. The discussion also describes letting special schools stay open or even building new special schools for these children.
The child has been removed from the regular classroom which shows that they are having difficult time working in with the normal student setting. Then the solution must comprise discovering an educational setting where students can be successful, right?
This leads you to wonder what you can do as a parent if your child has been sent home from school for misbehaving. I have thought about this in detail after dealing with the very same issues with my oldest child.
1. You have not failed as a parent. Don't waste time having a pity party for yourself. Perhaps your parenting skills could use some improvement, but that is the case for just about everyone. Try to be a better parent by actively seeking out information through books and materials on raising kids.
2. Do not blame it all on your child's school. Your school does care for your child and maybe the mishandled education of your child is due to issues beyond their boundaries like not having enough resources or inadequate teacher training.
3. Seek out assistance from the local education authority (LEA). They should be able to provide an alternative learning situation for your child. You need to be persistent when you contact them, but avoid being rude. You can ask your politicians and newspapers to help you get the ball rolling if you need to.
4. Understand that your child may need to move to an alternative classroom setting. Be ready for these changes. It is a good idea to understand that your child needs this help and to nip it in the bud now. It will be much worse later if you avoid dealing with your child's bad behaviors.
5. Seek professionals to determine if your child has a learning disability, ADHD or Asperger's syndrome. These can wreak havoc in the classroom. There is an enviroment in which children who suffer from these conditions can excel. It is a matter of finding the right educational setting.
6. Don't ignore or gloss over your child's behavior or kid yourself into thinking that they are a model student. You may feel like defending your child and think that everyone is incorrect about his behavior. It is more productive to acknowledge that there might be a problem and work with help from the LEA to resolve the issue.
Well, that's just a few quick thoughts about it.
Hope that is of some help to you, if you are struggling with this at home. And, if you are an educator, please don't be one of the ones that keeps trotting out that nonsense about excluding children as being the solution! It helps no one, and solves no problems.
Dr. Noel Swanson is a leading specialist on child behaviour. He has a fascinating website with lots of parenting advice that is well worth a visit.
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